September 29. 2020
The openness and the ease of uncertainty.
These perhaps aren't qualities you relate with uncertainty.
Then again, think of a game you like to play.
Likely part of its charm is the element of uncertainty, the suspense of the unknown. From my observation, part of play is uncertainty. Whether it is how the dice will fall, how another person will engage, or something else that keeps us on our toes.
So here we are, in one circumstance many of us enjoy the uncertainty and yet in daily life are exhausted by it.
"How to find more rest within the uncertainty in daily life?" feels like a relevant question.
First, imagine the future and all the unknowns. For me, what comes to mind is not knowing what Halloween will look like, what the Covid numbers will be, and whether those I love will stay healthy.
As I write this anxiety and fear start to rise. I feel pulled to move into planning and doing. Maybe researching if there are Halloween recommendations, and wash the face masks.
This is one way to be uncertain. Anxiety may call on us to mobilize, to do something. Hence part of the reason some of us are doing renos (my family included.) This can help, but what if the doing has got out of hand and is no longer serving? What if the anxiety is instead showing up as anger, impatience, and inability to rest?
Well, then there is the second way.
Uncertainty doesn't exist in the now. I don't mean this flippantly, I mean that "the now", is like shifting into a different gear.
In the present, we feel emotions and sensations.
Uncertainty doesn't exist in the now.
I have learnt this is in my body. So though this likely sounds abstract, through your body it is possible to experience the openness and beautiful possibility inherent in uncertainty.
Try it out with the below exploration.
Experiential Exploration of Uncertainty
Explore balance. Perhaps stand on one foot and wiggling the other leg around. Option to place a hand on the wall. Find in a position that is challenging but balancing is possible. Balance, move, and explore for long enough to get to know what it feels like and how you feel about it.
Now, shift the goal. Same posture, other foot. This time try to fall. Get to know this.
Journal what you observed.
Please take from this blog what works for you and leave what doesn't.
Also, if you feel called to share your wisdom and experience with me regarding uncertainty whether you agree or disagree please do.
I would also like to acknowledge my mentors, Sonia Potie and Anne Esguerra for helping me see that uncertainty has a beauty in it.